It seems over the years and with the increased social media activity distance is growing between us all. Instead of picking up the phone to call your friends, you send them a text.
I will admit I'm a guilty party to that as well.
Of course, life happens and this last week my car broke down. I wasn't surprised in the least. The car is 13 years old and has paid for itself time and time again.
One 'friend' (term loosely used) always seems to resort to calling or texting me at her most opportune times. Namely, when she's in need. I realized today that I truly don't know alot about this woman. I met her just over 2 years ago and it seems when she was seriously ill and in very much need, herself, no one was around. In moments like that you would think that would be a segway to disclosing more personal experiences and information about yourself. With her, no.
Why would I want to surround myself with someone who hasn't taken that risk of wanting to be my friend? Have we come to this as a society...we've become so suspicious of one another so much that it's just easier to send a mild text. Easier to call them once a month. Easier to keep everyone at arms length.
That kind of behavior doesn't keep you safe.
Life is about risks, taking chances. I know I'm a fine one to talk but I try my hardest to step off that ledge on a semi-regular basis.
So next time you meet someone who you think is cool, give them a chance, open yourself up just a bit. If they respond back in kind, then great, if not, then keep it moving.
Namaste,
Rhonda
Monday, April 30, 2012
Monday, April 9, 2012
Coincidence...I think not
A chance phone encounter with someone I went out on one date with last year came back into my life. Then when I thought about it again, this is the fourth time our paths have crossed in the last year. I began to wonder was it coincidence or was I supposed to learn something from this guy?
He confessed to me during our conversation that he never contacted me back again because of his own self-doubts. The tape player in his mind kept repeating, "Look at you, why would she want a guy like you anyway!" I would have never thought he would confess that to me but fine. I get self-doubt, I get self-sabotage but that kind of negative speak is beyond me. That showed me he had absolutely no confidence.
When my divorce was still fresh I had the same language swirling around in my head. Why would anyone want to consider dating someone like me? I had no job, I was sleeping on my friends daybed and my car was ten years old. In my mind, I had nothing else going for me. I was pathetic. Then I kept meeting men who had less than I did but had nerve to question my motives with them. If I wanted what little bit they already had, if I was looking for someone to lay up in my small space or looking to trap another man. It was none of those. I was looking for true companionship from someone who didn't call me a bitch every time I walked in the door. I was looking for outer peace to match the inner peace I had finally obtained. Like Mary J. Blige says, No More Drama! I was honestly looking for no more drama!
So my lesson with crossing paths with him again was to remind me of what I didn't want in my life going forward. I didn't want someone who questioned my true intentions. I didn't want someone who couldn't even look at themselves in the mirror without wanting to smash it. I didn't want someone who didn't believe in themselves. After all, why would I want someone who's my total opposite in all the negative things.
Honestly,
Rhonda
He confessed to me during our conversation that he never contacted me back again because of his own self-doubts. The tape player in his mind kept repeating, "Look at you, why would she want a guy like you anyway!" I would have never thought he would confess that to me but fine. I get self-doubt, I get self-sabotage but that kind of negative speak is beyond me. That showed me he had absolutely no confidence.
When my divorce was still fresh I had the same language swirling around in my head. Why would anyone want to consider dating someone like me? I had no job, I was sleeping on my friends daybed and my car was ten years old. In my mind, I had nothing else going for me. I was pathetic. Then I kept meeting men who had less than I did but had nerve to question my motives with them. If I wanted what little bit they already had, if I was looking for someone to lay up in my small space or looking to trap another man. It was none of those. I was looking for true companionship from someone who didn't call me a bitch every time I walked in the door. I was looking for outer peace to match the inner peace I had finally obtained. Like Mary J. Blige says, No More Drama! I was honestly looking for no more drama!
So my lesson with crossing paths with him again was to remind me of what I didn't want in my life going forward. I didn't want someone who questioned my true intentions. I didn't want someone who couldn't even look at themselves in the mirror without wanting to smash it. I didn't want someone who didn't believe in themselves. After all, why would I want someone who's my total opposite in all the negative things.
Honestly,
Rhonda
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
In 3's
You know that old saying, when something happens it usually ends up happening in three's. Once celebrity dies, then the second and you just know one more is coming.
Well that was definitely the truth for me this past Sunday. I knew, in my gut, that it was long overdue but I didn't think things would coming crashing down to the extent that it did.
It started with my bed frame crashing down to the floor. At first, I found it funny just because it happened in the most delicate circumstance. It was like a scene from a comedy that not even Jimmy Carrey could have played out any better than myself.
Then while trying to repair this busted up bed frame I ended up breaking my favorite martini glass completely in half. My Grandma always said to me growing up, "When you break a glass that means your breaking up trouble." But that was my second incident all in one evening. I just knew to sit back and wait for that last and final blow to come crashing in on me.
The last thing was someone ended up stealing my sunglasses from my house. Not sure if it was stealing or not but they were gone, not misplaced, just gone.
I laughed during and after every single one of those events this past Sunday evening. But once the quiet and the calm returned I became emotional. I'm well aware that all those things are material and can easily be replaced. I guess what struck me was how closely all these negative things occurred. Dealing with curve balls was always something I could do but on a more spread out basis. Not all within the same damn three hour span.
Yesterday, I took a moment to remember why I was grateful to even have a bed to sleep on. I was also grateful that I had nice martini glasses to sip from. And those sunglasses were a gift from a friend from over three years ago. They were even given to her as a promotional gift. I quickly realized it was the Universe showing me that it's time to clean house yet again. Time to make room for bigger and more substantial things going forward.
Honestly, I'm grateful to have a space where I can be fully relaxed and calm within...even if I do have to sleep on my mattress that's on the floor now...hahhaha
Namaste,
Rhonda
Well that was definitely the truth for me this past Sunday. I knew, in my gut, that it was long overdue but I didn't think things would coming crashing down to the extent that it did.
It started with my bed frame crashing down to the floor. At first, I found it funny just because it happened in the most delicate circumstance. It was like a scene from a comedy that not even Jimmy Carrey could have played out any better than myself.
Then while trying to repair this busted up bed frame I ended up breaking my favorite martini glass completely in half. My Grandma always said to me growing up, "When you break a glass that means your breaking up trouble." But that was my second incident all in one evening. I just knew to sit back and wait for that last and final blow to come crashing in on me.
The last thing was someone ended up stealing my sunglasses from my house. Not sure if it was stealing or not but they were gone, not misplaced, just gone.
I laughed during and after every single one of those events this past Sunday evening. But once the quiet and the calm returned I became emotional. I'm well aware that all those things are material and can easily be replaced. I guess what struck me was how closely all these negative things occurred. Dealing with curve balls was always something I could do but on a more spread out basis. Not all within the same damn three hour span.
Yesterday, I took a moment to remember why I was grateful to even have a bed to sleep on. I was also grateful that I had nice martini glasses to sip from. And those sunglasses were a gift from a friend from over three years ago. They were even given to her as a promotional gift. I quickly realized it was the Universe showing me that it's time to clean house yet again. Time to make room for bigger and more substantial things going forward.
Honestly, I'm grateful to have a space where I can be fully relaxed and calm within...even if I do have to sleep on my mattress that's on the floor now...hahhaha
Namaste,
Rhonda
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