Growing up I was always known as that girl who attended the Kingdom Hall of Jehovah's Witnesses. Having been raised in an inner city public school environment made that a bit tougher for me in many ways. The kids assumed that I was programmed to preach to them on command. On one end of the spectrum, the majority of the kids stayed away from me. Being ostracized became the norm. Then on the other end, I was allowed in to associate with what were deemed the outcasts. But within that realm I still tread very lightly.
During that time there was one scripture that seemed to have been drilled into my skull - 'Bad associations spoils useful habits'. That's only a small portion of it but you all get the general meaning. I took that scripture to heart growing up. Every person I surrounded myself with was looked at with my critical eye. But then I realized that I wasn't that type of person. I found it so difficult to judge so harshly. I knew everyone came from a different situation than mine. Some good and some very bad. I was the girl who became friendly with gang members from the Latin Kings. I was the girl who knew all the dope boys standing out on the corners everyday getting their hustle on. I never preached at anyone. I took the time to honestly get to know people and that's what made me the cool church girl at the end of the day.
During my freshman year in high school a long time friend of mine had confessed to me that she was pregnant. Mind you , I was 13 and she was 14 years old. I was so fearful of telling my mother about what was going on with her. I already knew deep down inside that my mother would instantly make me stop associating with her. I ended up telling my mother later on and was very surprised at her lack of reaction to the news.
Its taken me years to learn this but by her not reacting she was speaking volumes. Decisions were solely up to me at that point in my life. The messages were already embedded into my soul, it was up to me if I truly wanted to listen, take heed and try to integrate them into my daily life. Even in my adult years I find that some people just can't be trusted, saved or even helped. But the one constant, I'm realizing, those same kind of folks that many of you would deem degenerates, still flock to me. Within this last week I have been experiencing repetitive light bulb moments. I used to think guys, and some women, who did time in jail, once sold drugs, murdered people, considered moochers, baby making machines with no other goals in life and anything else you can label them, were just that. Most were products of there environments. They were never given the opportunity to see what was on the other side of that greener grass. And I often wondered why did they constantly gravitate towards me? I didn't hang out in what was considered in an unsavory environment. My close circle of friends were all educated, compassionate and active contributors to society. So why did I still cross paths with people like that on a semi-regular basis? Even to this day...
Sometimes what you are is what other people want to obtain, mold and create for themselves in their very own lives. That's exactly how it was for me growing up. I was on the constant lookout for an exceptional role model. I wanted to create a life for myself that I knew was obtainable. I was a city that was dying with no way out except college, if you could afford it, that was the yellow brick road to another world. A world where you create a new life of your own. Life is what you make it, after all. If you want to live the street life, selling drugs, getting into fights, working a job that's a joke and having multiple baby mama's/father's, then have at it. It's yours for the taking. But we all know human nature wants us to strive for more and for better. If you want something more meaningful, it's out there. You just have to take the hard steps to get to it. I apologize if I ended up sounding like a public service announcement but there is definite truth to those words. I can say that I'm living proof of that.
Your Voice:
Do you feel that you may attract what maybe the total opposite of what you stand for currently? Or do you take that attraction as something must be wrong within you?
Look forward to hearing from you all.
Namaste,
Rhonda Iris
4 comments:
You are only what you attract, when you don't get the lesson.
What we attract from other people are mere reflections of the lessons we didn't learn earlier. When we decide to date or hang out with people that are not on our level or are not any good to us or for us, and they are not elevating us to the next level; what we are really saying is, at this moment, "I don't see any value in my own life". When one sees value in there own life, they enjoy the space they take up and they are quick to see craziness trying to lurk into there lives.
I don't agree that we are the products of our environment. I think that we are all in the environment of not allowing ourselves to dream dreams and to really step outside of our own comfort zone. What I mean by that is this, we have all read stories of millionaires who grew up in the ghetto, slums and those who even survived the holocaust, but there was a burning desire to get out and to better their own lives, Some like me, decided to break the chain of dysfunction. Even the poorest of poor can dream tomorrows dreams and never get caught up on, if there was any role models in their environment. In life, you have to be your own role model, and your own dream keeper. Always know that you have the power to be the change you want to see. If someone else made it, you can too, you don't have to invent the wheel.
I say all of that is because, I too wanted a role model. As a gay black male, I didn't see successful gay black men in business. But I never let that stop me from pursuing my own dreams. I never let my own family not believing that education is key, to get in my way. But everyone I've dated, slept with or became friends with were all part of life lessons. I have dated men that I knew wasn't on my level, but when I looked back, I also saw a person not being happy with myself because of some setbacks life through my way. Now I know that when life through me some curve balls, not to date or sleep with anyone, because thats when foolishness and craziness shows up at the door.
No matter who you've dated or let into your own life, know this, it's only a test, no more, no less. That test continue to show up in your life when you get the lesson and truly ready to move on. Life is like grade school, you can only go to the next level when you have learned all that you were suppose to get from that level. So if you allowed someone to take up the space you dwell in, then they are only showing you just one of the test you must learn. The environment they came from, isn't irrelevant. You chose them just like you chose your parents and your family.
So, do I attract the opposite of what I stand for currently? Sure, If I didn't I wouldn't be learning life lessons. I now know that it's all test, "they" only show up when I fall behind. It's my job to be conscious at all times of where I am at in life. When I feel good about myself and I am moving forward on life's purpose, I can see foolishness standing across the street. But I've earned those badges. I know what I know, because I chose each and everyone that I've dated, slept with, became friends with, and even those who had a negative spirit. Because they were all lessons I needed to learn, in order for me to enjoy the space I take up currently. As far as, "Or do you take that attraction as something must be wrong within you"? No! Because there is nothing wrong with any of us; to say or feel that there was something wrong, is to say there is no lesson in life. Because, there is always a lesson in the game of "Life"
Hope that whoever is able to receive this, receive it with an open heart! Because thats the only way you will be able to get it and receive life lessons.
Enjoy
Wow! Well you two, I have to say you've both made very good points here.
Last night I started my first audio journal of all the new advances in my career as an artist. I have been watching all these different hip hop documentaries and music docs and just realized how important it would be to document how my evolution as an artist. I have decided to do this bc I want to spread the SAME message the man above is speaking about with lessons/dream seeking as well as what Rhonda is speaking of concerning the law of attraction.
I found myself covering these EXACT same mentioned things here in my audio entry last night. I recently have started shifting my thought paradigm from the Law of Attraction since watching a documentary called the Quantum Activist. This is available on instant streaming on Netflix, and I highly recommend watching it a few times over so that everything sinks in. Each time I watch it I learn something new.
Basically this film is about the scientific proof of God through Quantum physics. He uses the idea of the Law of Attraction and simply puts it as if two people are pulling up to a traffic light from two different directions both willing it to be green. Well, he asks, who is to decide which person is going to will it to be green? bc only one person can get the green. Here is where God comes in, he states. I'm not a preaching bible beater. I'm a pretty quiet Christian and at times haven't always been a believing Christian, either, but as my life has progressed I have truly started to see miracles that this physicist speaks of and that I believe can only be up to God. He basically says the green light is left up to God. He is the chooser of things of matter and nonmatter.
Having said all that, coming full circle back to my journal entry last night, I simply stated that everything in life is part of the journey. So, sometimes you attract people to help them, sometimes you attract those kinds of people to help YOU! This is a journey that God has put before us to walk with him and trust that each and every encounter is a "lesson" to learn from, good and bad and we must be just as thankful for the bad as we are the good. If we have this faith that there is a plan for us, a HUGE HUGE plan within all of us, then we can have the faith to follow our dreams with our FEAR. Fear is what holds us all back from our dreams, to agree with the guy above (sorry I don't know your name ;). So many people in sad environments don't have the faith that they have a plan. Even people in well off environments sometimes don't have that faith. Sometimes it's really not about the environment you've been in, but your personal choices to have the faith that every step has a purpose or you can chose to see all the negative and just keep taking step after step backwards. I'm choosing the positive everyday when I wake up. I know that good or bad its part of the journey and ALL of that is BEAUTIFUL! Since I've chosen this path, I have truly seen miracles unfold in my life, things that I've been begging and pleading for from God for so long but never trusted that I was good enough for them or would get them. We can ALL get those things if we believe!
Love, blessings and light to all. I hope my career as an artist or just my career in life, will somehow bring me to masses to speak this message! Thanks for your inspiration Rhonda! I am SO proud of YOU!
~Kristen aka R.L. Shine ;)
Funny, I just noticed Peregrination "The Process is the Journey" talk about fitting for your blog Rhonda!! My whole comment being about the journey. That was not on purpose, but a beautiful coincidence indeed.
You've both made some pretty amazing and certainly on point statements. No one is right or wrong on this one people.
At the end of the day, I truly hope that we're all aspiring to be do better and be better individuals. Faith is a key factor and having and holding a dream is another key factor. I think this all goes hand in hand. We, most definitely, are all here to learn and evolve from one another. But sometimes along the way people lose sight of that. For some it only becomes about themselves and feeding that only one desire. I know for me, sometimes it feels like people like that always get ahead, but I later realize it's only temporary. No one can exist in this world and only just suck up all the energy and resources and never give anything back. Life just doesn't work like that at the end of it all. It's about yin and yang, give and take...
Thanks so much for both of your comments. This makes it all worth it!
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